Defining Failure

I posted on Facebook yesterday: "Meleena is thinking about the milestones you don't achieve." And got two responses from friends...one said: "you mean like when i didn't run my first marathon?" and the second said: " or I didn't sleep with keanu reeves yet?"

And as so many things do these days it got me thinking about how we define failure. If we tried to run the marathon but only got to mile 5 is that failure? Or if we have always wanted to run the marathon, but never tried, always assuming it was out of our reach is that failure? Are they both?

We wouldn't say a couple who never tried to have children "failed to have them". But we might say that someone who never visited Paris "failed to see the Eiffel Tower".

I think we can break failure down into two distinct categories. Active failure, i.e. I went to Keanue Reeves home every day for 6 months but failed to sleep with him. And passive failure i.e. despite always wanting to sleep with Keanue Reeves I never even tried to meet him.

So if my life is more defined by my failures then my successes...and I believe it is...should I look at these two types of failures differently? And maybe more importantly can we always tell the difference between them?