The school year is more then half way past. I try to relish in the small moments of success my boys experience. Like being awarded "most improved student" for bringing grades up from F's to B's & C's and listening to one of my students talk about his dream of becoming a fireman and his excitement over having his drivers license. I try to focus away from the negative. The boys I can't reach no matter what I do. The ones who can not articulate what they plan to do after high school because they never thought about it.
My time in New Orleans has been so extreme. Torn between a job that is by far the hardest thing I have ever done, and new friendships and relationships that bring such joy and excitement about the future. This job will eat your insides if you let it. It is so easy to be consumed with what you can NOT do that you can easily forget what you are doing. Just by showing up. Everyday. Because they notice when you don't.
Time creeps along...and I am caught trying to make sure that making plans for the future does not happen at the cost of the present. That excitement for what is to come does not mean I miss moments to enjoy now. That the chance for failure does not become more likely then the chance for success. I find peace in quiet moments, like watching the Saints school the Cardinals in a playoff game, learning new definitions to words (like down here "excuse" means "get out of my way" not "pardon me") learning to cook Cajun style and making plans for what is next. If you've read up to this point you know I love big reveals...
Until next time, may you all be Gucci.
